Forward to when you are a Tween!

What a horrible mom moment to discover that I'd skipped through 8 years of this wonderful keepsake blog to re-discover it when you're now all of 12 years!(thanks to a conversation with M)

No more a baby certainly. And definitely a young woman bristling to find her identity. On the one hand you are a picture of self contained bliss, most happy while absorbed in your rhetoric within your mind palace. A secret alter-world that is run by the logic of Marvel characters with only allowances for the most exotic pets ranging from hamsters to chinchillas and sneks as you like to call them!. 

On the other hand, you are impatient with mum's word and her boring guardrails. In a seemingly staid school life, you think I overexagerate the perils out there. Mums can't help it can they? Even with the best intentions to not be like their own mums and with full memory of how sensitive, imbalanced and tentative life was at best in those vulnerable years. 

But how can they?  they are now armed with a repositary of what they've figured out...painfully at times and at other times understand that maybe they could have skipped all that anxiety because life has a way of delivering you to the right places destined for you. That you grow up just fine. 

Whats wonderful is that you still ask if I love you and how much. Every night as you are tucked into bed or randomly on a sunny afternoon as we're out and about. Just as you did at 2 and all through these years. It's always been important to you to hear that I love you. And then you cuddle knowing everything in the world is alright if only because you remain the center of my universe. 

And then your other world of school  friends orbit closer to your heart. The stories of Arielle and Sophie, Mira,  Juliana, Laila and Angad have filled many evenings and brought us closer to appreciating how you navigate the world with your understanding and compassion. 

Hammy Gus is your pet right now (who might very well be in his final days). " Be careful" you warn me about taking him out to the vet. "He might be overwhelmed". That's your maternal instinct right there. Always caring about people and how they might feel. 

You wander through the world percieving another's emotions and while we worry often that you might not project confidence, we might have got that wrong about you. I'm certain that your silent caring is your super power.